I've not posted lately, I know. I can't say I've been in the total doldrums because of the loss of my dad, although it obviously saddens me. I think I'm just trying to get on with my life but still trying to bury my head in the sand about the big "C" which is trying to rear its ugly head again. If I don't blog, I can sometimes forget, at least for a while.
Yes, the back pain has been ratcheting up again, despite loads of pain meds. Off for another MRI in Chapel Hill next week which will probably not show anything new to explain the pain increase because it usually doesn't (do I sound cynical or what?). I'm just anxious to find something new to help decrease the pain, something other than an opiate or traditional radiation (been there, done that).
Halloween is big in our house, so we're getting the house all decorated and ready. Our annual trick or treat event is on, so if you want to trick or treat with the kids, come on over! The only condition is that the adults also have to dress up :) It only comes once a year after all!
I hope that everyone is doing well and getting ready for the holiday season, which is just around the corner. (eeeekkkk) As for me, I'm just going to try and get some early shopping done and wait for our holiday travels to Amelia Island, Florida for Thanksgiving (lots of Santa events!) and to the Grove Park Inn in Asheville for Christmas. I could travel year round....
Lots of love to everyone,
Sofie
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Friday, September 10, 2010
Dad's obituary & memorial
Dad's obituary was in the paper today. I'm including a link to the obit in this blog for anyone interested. We did not include a picture but it's a nice write-up.
Also, for anyone interested, we'll be having dad's memorial service at Wilmington Cremation and Burial on 41st Street in Wilmington, on Sunday October 17 at 1 pm. We wanted to give friends and family from out of town a chance to come if they can. It will be very small and intimate per dad's wishes. He always said he wanted to be cremated and so that's what we've done.
For my local buddies, I'll be calling up willing troops soon to help me clean out my parents' house. Hopefully we'll have mom placed in a home soon and we can put the house on the market. For now, Bonnie continues to take good care of mom, but Geoff and I cannot afford round the clock care for too much longer. She should qualify for medicaid and that will hopefully pay fully for her care. Ugghhh. I never knew how hard it is to get financial help for elderly folks with alzheimers until this started -- someone needs to get medicare on board to start taking care of all these people. It's not fair that, if she had cancer or something, medicare would cover a nursing home stay for her. With alzheimers, however, there is no coverage unless you are dirt poor and qualify for medicaid. The income limit for medicaid is about $1100 a month. Seriously?????
The plan is to get her placed, pay for it for a few weeks, and have medicaid come in and pick up the tab. They'll probably take her meager social security and my dad's pension, but that beats trying to come up with about $5300 a month to pay for her care. What a racket!
Anyone, things should start to normalize again soon. Geoff and I are planning a much needed grown-up weekend away in a couple of weeks. Ahhhh. And Wendy and I are headed back to California in early December to either Napa or Mendocino. AHHHHH! Sure, I should be saving that money. But sometimes, you've got to pamper yourself, right? :)
Love,
Sofie
P.S. TGIF!
Also, for anyone interested, we'll be having dad's memorial service at Wilmington Cremation and Burial on 41st Street in Wilmington, on Sunday October 17 at 1 pm. We wanted to give friends and family from out of town a chance to come if they can. It will be very small and intimate per dad's wishes. He always said he wanted to be cremated and so that's what we've done.
For my local buddies, I'll be calling up willing troops soon to help me clean out my parents' house. Hopefully we'll have mom placed in a home soon and we can put the house on the market. For now, Bonnie continues to take good care of mom, but Geoff and I cannot afford round the clock care for too much longer. She should qualify for medicaid and that will hopefully pay fully for her care. Ugghhh. I never knew how hard it is to get financial help for elderly folks with alzheimers until this started -- someone needs to get medicare on board to start taking care of all these people. It's not fair that, if she had cancer or something, medicare would cover a nursing home stay for her. With alzheimers, however, there is no coverage unless you are dirt poor and qualify for medicaid. The income limit for medicaid is about $1100 a month. Seriously?????
The plan is to get her placed, pay for it for a few weeks, and have medicaid come in and pick up the tab. They'll probably take her meager social security and my dad's pension, but that beats trying to come up with about $5300 a month to pay for her care. What a racket!
Anyone, things should start to normalize again soon. Geoff and I are planning a much needed grown-up weekend away in a couple of weeks. Ahhhh. And Wendy and I are headed back to California in early December to either Napa or Mendocino. AHHHHH! Sure, I should be saving that money. But sometimes, you've got to pamper yourself, right? :)
Love,
Sofie
P.S. TGIF!
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
More on my dad
Hi everyone,
I'll make this short. We took dad off of life support yesterday after docs announced that there was nothing else they could do to help him. His fever was still 104, and he required more and more support to keep his heart and lungs working. I wanted to be there when he passed on and considered staying all night but headed home to get caught up on work and everything else that I have to do. At 1 am I got "the call" and hurried to the hospital, but he'd already passed away at about 1:30 am. Just looking at him I knew his soul was gone and that he'd headed to a better place. At least we know that :)
Now to getting mom in a nursing home. At least she has Bonnie to care for her until then... Lord knows I could not do that. Thank you for all your prayers. We'll probably have a memorial service for dad in mid October so out of towners can come - he wants to be cremated.
Thanks for your thoughts and well wishes,
Sofie
I'll make this short. We took dad off of life support yesterday after docs announced that there was nothing else they could do to help him. His fever was still 104, and he required more and more support to keep his heart and lungs working. I wanted to be there when he passed on and considered staying all night but headed home to get caught up on work and everything else that I have to do. At 1 am I got "the call" and hurried to the hospital, but he'd already passed away at about 1:30 am. Just looking at him I knew his soul was gone and that he'd headed to a better place. At least we know that :)
Now to getting mom in a nursing home. At least she has Bonnie to care for her until then... Lord knows I could not do that. Thank you for all your prayers. We'll probably have a memorial service for dad in mid October so out of towners can come - he wants to be cremated.
Thanks for your thoughts and well wishes,
Sofie
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
My Dad
Hi everyone,
As many of you have no doubt heard, my dad is in the hospital again. His PICC (sp?)(what oncologist uses to administer chemo) line got infected and he caught an e-coli infection. Then, he went into septic shock and had at least one heart attack. On Sunday morning, it looked like he would not make it. When his heart was trying to stop, docs shocked him. I went in early Sunday morning to be with him while he passed on (or so we thought). To make a long story short, he's still in the ICU, still on a ventilator with blood pressure meds and antibiotics and not doing so great. They tried to let him breathe on his own and his body reacted badly so they put him back on the ventilator. I don't know if he'll make it or not. Obviously, he has to be able to breathe on his own at some point. At the moment, we're just waiting to see if he can get rid of the infection. If he does, that may help his body strengthen enough to start breathing on its own. His heart is not happy at the moment so it's very iffy.
He is sedated and asleep at the ICU so he cannot talk on the phone. The ICU does not allow flowers or anything like that. Basically, we're just waiting and praying. I hope he can breathe on his own soon or we'll have to make some big decisions that I don't want to make.
Nevertheless, the family is set to go to Bald Head Island for Labor Day weekend. Geoff and my 12th wedding anniversary is the 5th so we absolutely have to celebrate. It's close enough that I can get back the hospital if I have to but the house is reserved and it's supposed to be amazing. Geoff got the rental as a fee in exchange for some work (on a civil case for a change). Otherwise, no family vacations any time soon. We're broke due to paying my mom's caregiver around the clock and me not working. We also have a rental house that we're going to try and sell. Anyone want to buy a 1500 square foot house in Churchill Estates in Wilmington for about $160,000? We need to overhaul that house that has had tenants for 8 + years and put it on the market. Busy busy. No time to get into trouble:)
As for me, I'm hanging on. Lots of pain and fatigue as usual. Taking lots of meds as usual. For the time being, I'm in charge of the Wonderly affairs. Scary! Thank goodness I've surrendered my care and concerns to God. Lord knows I'm not capable of handling this on my own. One blessing with living in crisis mode is that you learn how to deal with crisis!
Many blessings to everyone. Please pray for my dad.... I want to keep his stubborn a** around for a while longer!
Love,
Sofie
As many of you have no doubt heard, my dad is in the hospital again. His PICC (sp?)(what oncologist uses to administer chemo) line got infected and he caught an e-coli infection. Then, he went into septic shock and had at least one heart attack. On Sunday morning, it looked like he would not make it. When his heart was trying to stop, docs shocked him. I went in early Sunday morning to be with him while he passed on (or so we thought). To make a long story short, he's still in the ICU, still on a ventilator with blood pressure meds and antibiotics and not doing so great. They tried to let him breathe on his own and his body reacted badly so they put him back on the ventilator. I don't know if he'll make it or not. Obviously, he has to be able to breathe on his own at some point. At the moment, we're just waiting to see if he can get rid of the infection. If he does, that may help his body strengthen enough to start breathing on its own. His heart is not happy at the moment so it's very iffy.
He is sedated and asleep at the ICU so he cannot talk on the phone. The ICU does not allow flowers or anything like that. Basically, we're just waiting and praying. I hope he can breathe on his own soon or we'll have to make some big decisions that I don't want to make.
Nevertheless, the family is set to go to Bald Head Island for Labor Day weekend. Geoff and my 12th wedding anniversary is the 5th so we absolutely have to celebrate. It's close enough that I can get back the hospital if I have to but the house is reserved and it's supposed to be amazing. Geoff got the rental as a fee in exchange for some work (on a civil case for a change). Otherwise, no family vacations any time soon. We're broke due to paying my mom's caregiver around the clock and me not working. We also have a rental house that we're going to try and sell. Anyone want to buy a 1500 square foot house in Churchill Estates in Wilmington for about $160,000? We need to overhaul that house that has had tenants for 8 + years and put it on the market. Busy busy. No time to get into trouble:)
As for me, I'm hanging on. Lots of pain and fatigue as usual. Taking lots of meds as usual. For the time being, I'm in charge of the Wonderly affairs. Scary! Thank goodness I've surrendered my care and concerns to God. Lord knows I'm not capable of handling this on my own. One blessing with living in crisis mode is that you learn how to deal with crisis!
Many blessings to everyone. Please pray for my dad.... I want to keep his stubborn a** around for a while longer!
Love,
Sofie
Monday, August 2, 2010
Cancer SUCKS!
More fun and games in the cancer department. While at my oncology appointment last Monday in Chapel Hill, Geoff and I got a call that my dad was in the hospital. Apparently, the tumor on his lung has gotten quite large and he had a buildup of fluid around his lung causing shortness of breath. One week later, he's still there. They drained the fluid and he is breathing better, but his white blood cell count got very low because of chemotherapy, as low as .02 (it's supposed to be between 4 and 10) which meant that he had basically no immune system. Several blood transfusions later, his white blood cell count has risen slightly and they were getting ready to discharge him. Now, of course, he's developed a staph infection because of his weak immunity, being in the hospital, and the PICC line they have in his arm to administer chemo. What a mess. My mom (in the late stages of Alzheimers in case anyone didn't know) is staying with her caregiver all day/night to the tune of $120/day funded by Geoff and I. Which is great since I'm no longer working and not yet receiving disability. Did I mention that cancer sucks the big one?!
UGGGHHH! I met with a neurologist at my last appointment. He did find neuropathy in my hands and feet and apparently I was a bit unsteady in my gait when he tested my walking/balance abilities. He recommended another lumbar puncture (yikes) because apparently one test provides very little diagnostic information and you need to have about 3 to really rule out metastases in the spinal fluid. The neurologist also wants me to get another brain MRI to rule out metastases in my brain with all the headaches I'm having and the neurological issues. Again, blissful ignorance sounds more fun. Can't I just bury my head in the sand and pretend none of this is going on? If I did have brain mets, I'm not sure I'd want to know. Sure, they can radiate your head and whatnot but I think at that point I'd prefer to just let the disease run its course. I don't look at that as giving up, either. Sometimes the treatment is worse than the disease itself (look at my dad's situation). I've probably mentioned this before but I put quality of life before quantity of life. I've given up on modern medicine as providing me with satisfying answers to all of my present health problems after being let down so many times.
So that brings me right back to the big man upstairs and trusting in Him to get me through ALL of this. Because to me, right now, this situation seems impossible. What will I do if my dad passes away before my mom? Aside from the emotional sadness of that, practically it is a nightmare. But, one day at a time, right? One minute at a time, in fact. Right now, I have the tools to get through today. Maybe I can stay rested enough today to avoid getting one of my usual head-splitting headaches accompanied by nausea. God has provided me with everything I need to get through this day and this immediate crisis. I need to surrender my worries and cares and let him handle the rest. Easier said than done, isn't it?
At least Opus is back from training camp. It's almost as though he's a new dog! He has good manners, is quieter, and calmer. Camp Hooks "dejerked" our dog! I love it. It's so nice to have my sweet puppy back. He went for his first swim in the ocean last weekend!! It was awesome to see his little webbed feet doing the dog paddle in the ocean waves at Oak Island. Now that brought a smile to my face:)
Love to all,
Sofie
UGGGHHH! I met with a neurologist at my last appointment. He did find neuropathy in my hands and feet and apparently I was a bit unsteady in my gait when he tested my walking/balance abilities. He recommended another lumbar puncture (yikes) because apparently one test provides very little diagnostic information and you need to have about 3 to really rule out metastases in the spinal fluid. The neurologist also wants me to get another brain MRI to rule out metastases in my brain with all the headaches I'm having and the neurological issues. Again, blissful ignorance sounds more fun. Can't I just bury my head in the sand and pretend none of this is going on? If I did have brain mets, I'm not sure I'd want to know. Sure, they can radiate your head and whatnot but I think at that point I'd prefer to just let the disease run its course. I don't look at that as giving up, either. Sometimes the treatment is worse than the disease itself (look at my dad's situation). I've probably mentioned this before but I put quality of life before quantity of life. I've given up on modern medicine as providing me with satisfying answers to all of my present health problems after being let down so many times.
So that brings me right back to the big man upstairs and trusting in Him to get me through ALL of this. Because to me, right now, this situation seems impossible. What will I do if my dad passes away before my mom? Aside from the emotional sadness of that, practically it is a nightmare. But, one day at a time, right? One minute at a time, in fact. Right now, I have the tools to get through today. Maybe I can stay rested enough today to avoid getting one of my usual head-splitting headaches accompanied by nausea. God has provided me with everything I need to get through this day and this immediate crisis. I need to surrender my worries and cares and let him handle the rest. Easier said than done, isn't it?
At least Opus is back from training camp. It's almost as though he's a new dog! He has good manners, is quieter, and calmer. Camp Hooks "dejerked" our dog! I love it. It's so nice to have my sweet puppy back. He went for his first swim in the ocean last weekend!! It was awesome to see his little webbed feet doing the dog paddle in the ocean waves at Oak Island. Now that brought a smile to my face:)
Love to all,
Sofie
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
July
So another month has passed since I've posted. I really am trying to bury my head in the sand....
I ended up having the epidural blood patch done to get ride of the spinal headaches caused by the lumbar puncture from June. That helped get rid of those nasty, debilitating headaches. Unfortunately, over the past few days, I've started getting new headaches of a different variety :( This stinks! Nausea, burping, and the left side of my head pounding in primarily one spot. I think it would feel better if I could put my head inside of a vise! Crazy, I know. Since this past Sunday, I've been largely useless. Again.
On another note, the floors turned out great! Well worth all of the effort. Our house feels so new, it's wonderful! Thank you, Kevin Foley!
We're spending most of our time in Oak Island though, where the girls are attending summer day camps. Going roller skating, bowling, to museums, swimming, playing tennis, and to the aquarium in Myrtle Beach. Busy! Our biggest activity though is driving. That's right. They're doing gymnastics classes 2 days a week, each of them, in Wilmington. On different days. So, 4 days a week, us girls head up the road about 35 miles (each way) for gymnastics classes. Ugghhhh.. I lost my sitters so it's me driving. Scary, I know! But, since I'm not really working, can't really afford to pay the sitter to do the driving anyway. Just a couple more weeks of this.
On Friday, we're heading to Greensboro to the Grandover Resort :) for 2 nights. We plan to go to the zoo in Asheboro on Saturday. Then, we head to Chapel Hill for 2 nights. On Monday, I have a PET scan to try and find out why the he## I feel so crappy, have so much back pain, fatigue etc. I also see my oncologist on Monday and meet a Neurologist. Hopefully, the Neurologist can interpret my spinal fluid results from the lumbar puncture and give me some answers. The worst part is not knowing, honestly. The doctors are satisfied just to find that there's no cancer in my CSF (spinal fluid). I am happy too, but I WANT TO HAVE ANSWERS!!!! Why am I so tired I could sleep for 3 days straight? Why does my lower back feel like it's been run over by an 18 wheeler? Why is my head pounding and I feel like I could throw up all day long? WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY? I really can say that the not knowing has been worse than all of the information I have been provided by all these docs for the past 3 years. Anyway, there, I've vented.
So we have doc visits on Monday the 26th. One more night at the glorious Carolina Inn in Chapel Hill (with the best biscuits and banana bread EVER!) and then back home. We're picking up dear Opus from doggie boot camp where he's been for 3 weeks. I miss him! Hopefully, he's learned a lot and is ready to be the sweet, obedient doggie I know he can be. Then, after that, we hope to have a few days at Oak Island, as a family, for real vacation. No work, no gymnastics, no driving. We can act like all the rest of the tourists hanging out at our condo complex that I'm so jealous of right now. Yippee!
I hope everyone is enjoying summer! I'll post later after I see the doc. Don't expect me to post right away though. No news is good news if you don't hear from me. If something unusual shows up on the PET scan, I'll report it here ASAP.
Much love,
Sofie
I ended up having the epidural blood patch done to get ride of the spinal headaches caused by the lumbar puncture from June. That helped get rid of those nasty, debilitating headaches. Unfortunately, over the past few days, I've started getting new headaches of a different variety :( This stinks! Nausea, burping, and the left side of my head pounding in primarily one spot. I think it would feel better if I could put my head inside of a vise! Crazy, I know. Since this past Sunday, I've been largely useless. Again.
On another note, the floors turned out great! Well worth all of the effort. Our house feels so new, it's wonderful! Thank you, Kevin Foley!
We're spending most of our time in Oak Island though, where the girls are attending summer day camps. Going roller skating, bowling, to museums, swimming, playing tennis, and to the aquarium in Myrtle Beach. Busy! Our biggest activity though is driving. That's right. They're doing gymnastics classes 2 days a week, each of them, in Wilmington. On different days. So, 4 days a week, us girls head up the road about 35 miles (each way) for gymnastics classes. Ugghhhh.. I lost my sitters so it's me driving. Scary, I know! But, since I'm not really working, can't really afford to pay the sitter to do the driving anyway. Just a couple more weeks of this.
On Friday, we're heading to Greensboro to the Grandover Resort :) for 2 nights. We plan to go to the zoo in Asheboro on Saturday. Then, we head to Chapel Hill for 2 nights. On Monday, I have a PET scan to try and find out why the he## I feel so crappy, have so much back pain, fatigue etc. I also see my oncologist on Monday and meet a Neurologist. Hopefully, the Neurologist can interpret my spinal fluid results from the lumbar puncture and give me some answers. The worst part is not knowing, honestly. The doctors are satisfied just to find that there's no cancer in my CSF (spinal fluid). I am happy too, but I WANT TO HAVE ANSWERS!!!! Why am I so tired I could sleep for 3 days straight? Why does my lower back feel like it's been run over by an 18 wheeler? Why is my head pounding and I feel like I could throw up all day long? WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY? I really can say that the not knowing has been worse than all of the information I have been provided by all these docs for the past 3 years. Anyway, there, I've vented.
So we have doc visits on Monday the 26th. One more night at the glorious Carolina Inn in Chapel Hill (with the best biscuits and banana bread EVER!) and then back home. We're picking up dear Opus from doggie boot camp where he's been for 3 weeks. I miss him! Hopefully, he's learned a lot and is ready to be the sweet, obedient doggie I know he can be. Then, after that, we hope to have a few days at Oak Island, as a family, for real vacation. No work, no gymnastics, no driving. We can act like all the rest of the tourists hanging out at our condo complex that I'm so jealous of right now. Yippee!
I hope everyone is enjoying summer! I'll post later after I see the doc. Don't expect me to post right away though. No news is good news if you don't hear from me. If something unusual shows up on the PET scan, I'll report it here ASAP.
Much love,
Sofie
Friday, June 18, 2010
Long time, no write
I did not realize it's been a month since I've posted... sorry. A lot has happened and most of it has not been very positive.
My birthday party was canceled because I felt like crud. I could barely get out of bed that day; I was exhausted and had lots of back pain. I realized that the party would not be fun for me in that condition. So we canceled.
A couple of weeks later, I ended up in the hospital. Geoff and I, with the generosity of our church small group, had planned a "grown up weekend" away in downtown Wilmington. Again, I felt so lousy that we checked out of the Inn and I went to the hospital. Instead of a nice dinner and a bottle of wine, I enjoyed Dilaudid (sp?) and an IV. But, I got a lot of sleep and, with the exception of the 2 hour spinal MRI that was about as comfortable as lying on a sidewalk, without moving, next to a jackhammer, the hospital admission was not too bad of an experience.
Then, last week, I was subjected to a Lumbar Puncture or spinal tap where a radiologist removed spinal fluid from my back. Fun. They neglected to mention that I would then have the worst headache known to man for almost 2 weeks. Just getting out of bed left me nearly vomiting. My head and neck were pounding and pulsating with pain, my ears were ringing and I could not hear, and I felt nauseous anytime I was not flat on my back. So I missed our family's trip to Massachusetts and stayed in bed for a week. 10 days later, I'm a lot better but still break into a sweat when I am sitting upright for too long. Like right now. I tried to drive yesterday and, well, that was interesting. Anyhoo, I suppose I'm on the mend and am grateful for that.
The LP test was done to rule out metastases in the spinal fluid. I believe that they have done that, although my oncologist does not know why my white blood cell count was high. I need to see a neurologist to try and figure out why I still feel so lousy, have so much back pain, and have other neuropathic issues such as tingling and weakness in my hands and feet. Of course, I was supposed to see the neurologist in Chapel Hill last week but was not well enough to sit in the car at all.... In any event, I'm going to wait a few weeks. I need to have some kind of life outside of seeing all these doctors for a while. The docs can't seem to help my quality of life but sure do a good job of wrecking it. They mean well, of course, but it's just not working. In the meantime, I'd like to have a bit of fun and amusement....
On that note, we're headed to Oak Island next week while our floors get sanded and finished in Leland. That's going to be another mess to contend with, cleaning our house after the floor finishing, but I'm looking forward to having the whole process done. And excited about some laid back beach time with a good novel or two. The girls will be in camp down there next week too, which is good because they're already set to kill each other having been out of school for just one week! Thank God for summer camps.
I hope that everyone is enjoying their summer! Thanks for all of the assistance and prayers. I am sorry if I was not always a very chipper "camper" when people called after the LP. There's nothing like having no control of your own life, being flat on your back and unable to take care of yourself or do anything fun, to put me in a bad mood. The lack of control is a biggie... I have no control over anything these days despite my efforts to get my health back on track. And that is frustrating. So, I love you all and appreciate everything people did for me the past few weeks, but PLEASE don't ask me to talk about it any more... I need to think of something besides headaches, back aches, spinal fluid, nausea, and, oh yeah, cancer!
Love,
Sofie
My birthday party was canceled because I felt like crud. I could barely get out of bed that day; I was exhausted and had lots of back pain. I realized that the party would not be fun for me in that condition. So we canceled.
A couple of weeks later, I ended up in the hospital. Geoff and I, with the generosity of our church small group, had planned a "grown up weekend" away in downtown Wilmington. Again, I felt so lousy that we checked out of the Inn and I went to the hospital. Instead of a nice dinner and a bottle of wine, I enjoyed Dilaudid (sp?) and an IV. But, I got a lot of sleep and, with the exception of the 2 hour spinal MRI that was about as comfortable as lying on a sidewalk, without moving, next to a jackhammer, the hospital admission was not too bad of an experience.
Then, last week, I was subjected to a Lumbar Puncture or spinal tap where a radiologist removed spinal fluid from my back. Fun. They neglected to mention that I would then have the worst headache known to man for almost 2 weeks. Just getting out of bed left me nearly vomiting. My head and neck were pounding and pulsating with pain, my ears were ringing and I could not hear, and I felt nauseous anytime I was not flat on my back. So I missed our family's trip to Massachusetts and stayed in bed for a week. 10 days later, I'm a lot better but still break into a sweat when I am sitting upright for too long. Like right now. I tried to drive yesterday and, well, that was interesting. Anyhoo, I suppose I'm on the mend and am grateful for that.
The LP test was done to rule out metastases in the spinal fluid. I believe that they have done that, although my oncologist does not know why my white blood cell count was high. I need to see a neurologist to try and figure out why I still feel so lousy, have so much back pain, and have other neuropathic issues such as tingling and weakness in my hands and feet. Of course, I was supposed to see the neurologist in Chapel Hill last week but was not well enough to sit in the car at all.... In any event, I'm going to wait a few weeks. I need to have some kind of life outside of seeing all these doctors for a while. The docs can't seem to help my quality of life but sure do a good job of wrecking it. They mean well, of course, but it's just not working. In the meantime, I'd like to have a bit of fun and amusement....
On that note, we're headed to Oak Island next week while our floors get sanded and finished in Leland. That's going to be another mess to contend with, cleaning our house after the floor finishing, but I'm looking forward to having the whole process done. And excited about some laid back beach time with a good novel or two. The girls will be in camp down there next week too, which is good because they're already set to kill each other having been out of school for just one week! Thank God for summer camps.
I hope that everyone is enjoying their summer! Thanks for all of the assistance and prayers. I am sorry if I was not always a very chipper "camper" when people called after the LP. There's nothing like having no control of your own life, being flat on your back and unable to take care of yourself or do anything fun, to put me in a bad mood. The lack of control is a biggie... I have no control over anything these days despite my efforts to get my health back on track. And that is frustrating. So, I love you all and appreciate everything people did for me the past few weeks, but PLEASE don't ask me to talk about it any more... I need to think of something besides headaches, back aches, spinal fluid, nausea, and, oh yeah, cancer!
Love,
Sofie
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